Thursday, July 9, 2009

Maybe I can actually swim?

For the last few months my swim (or lack there of) has been pretty consistent. Consistently bad. Not that I haven’t been swimming, but I really haven’t been swimming with any purpose and likely because of that, I haven’t gotten anywhere. After yet another crappy a swim a few weeks ago I asked Graeme when I just give up. I am and have always been comfortable in the water, did all my Red Cross levels and even taught kids to swim in high school, but I have never swam laps. Handstands, flips, pretending to synchronized swim, that’s how I spent my time in the water. And anytime there was a pool or water around, I was in it. I was always wrinkly on vacations.
So for the last while, I have been trying to learn or relearn to swim. And I am sure I have not gone about it very well! No plan, no planned workouts, just getting in the pool and doing what I could.
It hasn't worked well so that is stopping.

I asked Graeme if he would help me. He said yes, but that it would be hard. I asked him if I would cry. He said maybe.

So the plan is for more sessions with the swim coach. I did a few earlier this year and they really helped and then to do whatever workout Graeme tells me. I’m about 2 weeks in and I already feel like there has been a huge difference. I did my longest swim ever on Sunday. 2475m or 2700yds. Yes, I know, short for most people, but it’s a really good step in the right direction for me. Every workout so far I have thought I wouldn’t be able to do, but I actually haven’t had any difficulty in doing them. Yes, they are slow meters, but I’m swimming!

My confidence is building as well, which I think is huge. When I get in the water now, I try my best not to think negative thoughts. Its a lot easier to do swimming on a sunny day at Kits Pool, but I'm hoping to transfer over those good feelings to the local pool too (though I'm not quite there yet). I keep telling myself I can do this. I have to believe I can and I will keep working at it until that is true. At least as long as Graeme will make workouts for me. And its not that I can't make them myself, but when we makes them for me, I feel like I have to get through it or I'll let him down. When really, he doesn't care. Well that's not really true of course. He wants me to succeed and he's knows I want to get better so he does care. But its not going to change how he feels about me if I can swim or not.


Julie said...

You CAN swim and you are proving it every time you crawl over those feelings of inadequacy and fear. The biggest obstacles we face are ourselves and I am so proud of you for facing your swimming demons head on!!!

YOU ROCK!!!!! :) :) :)

jen said...

Great job on the long swim and pushing yourself in the pool. I know what you mean about having G make your workouts for you. When I make them myself I tend to doubt myself and second-guess everything. I think you're really onto something.

Keep up the good work! :)